My Connections to Play

*All work and no play make Jack a dull boy –Proverb

 

*Life is more fun when you are living, working and playing with a mate who truly cares about what happens in every area of your life. –Ritu Ghatourey

                                                              

As a child, play was supported by my parents, teachers, ministry leaders, and playmates in the community. My parents were very strict about the amount of time we spent idling in the house or in front of the television. If we were doing nothing, just sitting around talking, dad would say something like, “get up, go outside and find something to do”. If we watched TV for longer than an hour at a time, mom would just turn the set off and say, “go outside and catch some fresh air”. The worst thing for us to say to our parents was – I’m bored – omgosh, “spring” cleaning was on! (even if it was winter!)

Several instruments of play were always found in our house, to name a few: a ball; a clothesline, used for jump rope or double-dutch; hula hoops (whoosh, whoosh); rocks that were used to draw hopscotch designs; and bicycles. Every child in the neighborhood had one or more of these items, if not all. We were not fortunate to take annual vacation trips but we made many visits to local parks, Miller beach, and the Museum of Science and Industry.

 

                  

 

             At school, we had P.E. (gym) once a week, we actually worked out the whole time and we had a full hour for lunch; we ate and then played outside. We only stayed in if it was raining or below 0 degrees. At the church I attended, we had Sunday school in the morning service and BTU (Baptist training unit) in the evening service. BTU was the best because it was active learning. The ministry leader always had some type of activity to illustrate the lesson which made it practical for us to understand and demonstrate in our lives; much of it, I still remember today. The children in the neighborhood, my playmates, were never dull or boring. We did everything (in the name of exploring) from make-believe safaris (using sticks as machetes to cut through tall grass) to visiting the local funeral home to look at the deceased; it was all adventurous to us.

The type of play I knew as a child is rapidly becoming extinct. In the past, one could drive down any block and see children actively playing outdoors. Today, many blocks look like retirement communities. Children are encouraged to stay indoors more because it is either too hot or unsafe to play outside. Inside the house, children are limited to technology for entertainment because the rule “don’t rip and run in the house” or “don’t play in the house”, still exists. I agree that times have changed and it is not as safe for children to play outdoors as it once was but doing away with play is not the answer; instead of sending children out to play, adults accompanying their children while at play-is the answer.

The role of play was very strong throughout my childhood and still is today. Learning is fun. I like to engage others in learning projects that they will enjoy and make their own because only then will it become transferrable from one person to another. I tell my children, “learn it, use it, and pass it on.”

Relationship Reflection

          Partnerships and relationships are very important to me. I have many relationships with family, friends, co-workers, and casual acquaintances. Currently, I am engaged in two partnerships, but before I elaborate on them, let me clarify how I distinguish between the two. I form relationships with individuals through opportunities or situations that connect us together. I tend to cling to relationships that inspire me to become a better person and those that allow me to help others in need. Partnerships, for me, are of a more intimate nature. I perceive it as two or more individuals working together towards a common goal or purpose. Relationships are important to me, however, with the understanding that they come and go. Partnerships are cultivated over a period of time and are broken only by death; death of a business, emotion, or person.

I have many relationships, some I will group together such as my children I have six (five are adults). The five of them are in my relationship category because though we all get along wonderfully; our goals are no longer the same. They are doing well establishing and developing their homes with their spouses and children. I am so proud of all of them. Some morals, standards, and values they learned during childhood transferred on to their children and some did not; I can appreciate that. Then there is Ollie, whom I consider a very good friend, we do not always see eye-to-eye on things but we can always trust each other to tell the truth even when we know it is going to hurt. Kumbi is my faithful co-worker and prayer partner. Though we each have specific duties on the job; we work together to get the job done even if it means helping the other with their tasks. We laugh, we talk, we pray. Casual acquaintances are parents that support the childcare facility I own and operate. I enjoy getting to know them, their children, the adventures, and the challenges we face daily.

The two partnerships I mentioned earlier are 1) me and my heavenly Father, and 2) me and my 12yr old daughter. In both partnerships, we are working together to fulfill a common goal/purpose. Yes, we face many hindrances and obstacles along the way, but never to the extent of separation. When we fall out with one another, we are quick to make amends. No matter what happened during the day we never fail to let one another know how much the other is loved and appreciated and we continue the journey towards reaching our ultimate destination.

            In building extended relationships and maintaining successful partnerships, the greatest lesson I have learned is-you can have neither without the ability to communicate effectively. Any relationship can develop into a partnership when two or more began working together towards a specific goal or purpose. Likewise, partnerships are broken when the vision, goal, or purpose is lost and all involved begin to establish personal agendas independent of others.

            Effective programs and practices has helped to expand my knowledge and awareness of the importance of building positive relationships with the children I serve and the benefits of partnering with caregivers to provide every child with the quality of life they deserve.